"FAFO: Trump’s Trade War, Our Loss"
Here’s a little acronym for all those MAGA morons still worshipping at the altar of Trump: FAFO: Fuck Around and Find Out.
It’s been seven years to the day since the FBI raided my home, hotel, and law office. April 9th, 2018. Mark it. A day that shattered my loyalty to the man I once would’ve taken a bullet for. And let me tell you, I thank God every day that I took a subpoena instead. Because here we are, all these years later, and Donald J. Trump is still gaslighting America with the kind of brazen lies that would make even Stormy Daniels blush.
The latest? That foreign leaders; all of them, are blowing up his phone, begging, pleading, practically groveling to end the tariffs. According to Donald, world leaders are lined up like it's Black Friday at Walmart. But here’s a little acronym for all those MAGA morons still worshipping at the altar of Trump: FAFO: Fuck Around and Find Out.
And oh boy, are we finding out.
Let’s start with China. Remember them? The country that produces about, um, I don’t know; everything in your house that doesn’t say “Made in Ohio”? Well, in Trump’s deranged fantasy, China’s leadership is on its knees, praying for mercy from the Great Negotiator. But in reality? Not so much.
As of this morning, there are 104% U.S. tariffs imposed on Chinese goods, and in retaliation, China slapped back with 84% tariffs on American exports. That’s not leadership; that’s a pissy slap-fight in a playground sandbox, and guess who’s getting buried? You. The American consumer. Not the billionaires, not the corporate boardrooms sipping champagne over lobster bisque, and definitely not Trump himself.
You, the average American family; the ones MAGA claims to fight for, you’re the ones bleeding out at the checkout line. Try finding affordable sneakers for your kids, or electronics that don’t cost an arm, leg, and half your rent. And you think Trump gives a shit? Please. This is a man who thinks Pringles are a food group and that windmills cause cancer. He’s not sweating the rising cost of your toothpaste.
Speaking of out-of-touch elitists making fools of themselves, let’s give a dishonorable mention to billionaire Howard Lutnick. The man strutted onto Face the Nation this week and let loose a statement so galactically dumb, I had to rewind it twice to believe he actually said it. Quote: “I can’t wait to work in the iPhone screw factory. That kind of thing is going to come to America.” Really, Howard? You, in a screw factory? That’s like saying Trump’s going vegan. This wasn’t just detached; it was cosmically stupid. A billionaire pretending he’s ready to clock in on an assembly line is as believable as Trump passing a lie detector test. Right up there with his infamous “mother-in-law wouldn’t panic if her social security check didn’t come in” comment; he’s proving that for some, the higher the net worth, the lower the self-awareness.
The problem is, Donald doesn't have anyone around him with the guts to tell him the truth anymore. No one to say, “Hey boss, maybe we shouldn’t light the global economy on fire just so you can play dictator in your golden golf cart.” I used to be that guy. But that’s gone now. Trump surrounded himself with sycophants, not soldiers. With Peter Navarro types, who couldn’t navigate a trade deal if their life depended on it. Navarro pushed his asinine “Death by China” playbook like it was scripture, while Elon Musk, for all his own quirks and ego, has at least tried to keep global business flowing; because he understands that tariffs hurt production, profit, and progress. They hurt him!
Navarro’s approach? Burn it all down. Musk’s? At least pretend you understand economics. Dysfunction versus vision. That’s the contrast.
But Trump doesn’t do “vision.” He does vengeance.
And as much as he likes to cosplay as a populist hero, he doesn’t give a flying fuck about the American worker. All this “he’s one of us” garbage? It’s bullshit. Donald Trump is not one of you. Never was. He wouldn’t know a blue-collar struggle if it smacked him with a union dues notice. He was born into wealth, raised on privilege, and has spent his life stomping over the very people he claims to fight for. He’s not Moses leading the chosen out of Egypt; he’s Pharaoh building another golden tower with your last paycheck.
So I ask again; where are the people around him with the courage to say, “Enough!”? Where is his Michael Cohen? His real fixer? The guy willing to fight with him, to tell him hard truths, not just kiss the ring and collect a paycheck. They’re gone. Purged. Replaced by cultists and cowards. And this is what you get: dysfunction, uncertainty, and devastation masquerading as leadership.
Here’s what someone like me would say to him right now. Mr. President, it’s time to get serious. You need to immediately halt this idiotic tariff war. You need to immediately clean house and replace the sycophants with actual experts. You need to immediately get off Truth Social and into real policy briefings. If you don’t, you’re not just screwing yourself, this Presidency and your legacy; you’re screwing all of us.
Because FAFO isn't just a warning anymore; it’s a prophecy. And Donald? He’s halfway to the “find out” part.
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I always love your writing. The mix of gritty truth and humor.
Where is the Republican congress???? This crap is lunacy! I think all his cabinet got out of the market because they knew it would crash. Thats why they are not hurting!