"From Boom to Bust: MAGA Applauds"

Who actually wakes up in the morning and thinks, “Fuck yeah, I’d love for my iPhone to cost 40% more so Trump can pretend he’s being tough on China”?

As of this post, in one hour; if economists are correct in their predictions, we are expecting another day of chaos on Wall Street, with trillions more being lost in the market thanks to President Trump’s self-inflicted tariff policy wound.

That’s right, America. We’re barely into the first 100 days of this MAGA 2.0 nightmare and already our economy is doing the financial equivalent of belly-flopping off the Empire State Building while Trump live-streams it on Truth Social with Kid Rock playing the national anthem on a kazoo in the background.

Let’s not sugarcoat this; unless Trump slaps a tariff on sugar imports, too, which is probably already in the works. Seventy percent of Americans; Republicans, Democrats, Independents, Libertarians, the politically disengaged, your grandma who still writes checks at the grocery store, all agree: this man is steering the economy into an iceberg, and the only people left cheering him on are the ones trying to sell flotation devices at ten times the price. That’s the miracle of Trumpenomics: higher costs for everyone, blame anyone or everyone, and credit for himself.

Now let’s talk about that other thirty percent. You know who they are. Or maybe you don’t, which actually would explain everything. These are the diehards who believe tariffs are some sort of economic fairy dust that, when sprinkled liberally by their demagogue, magically brings back 1950s steel jobs and Mayberry-style prosperity. Except instead of Andy Griffith, we’ve got Trump; and instead of community policing, we’ve got Steve Bannon wearing a fur hat on a podcast shouting conspiracy theories at a microphone like a coked-up televangelist.

Seriously, who wants to pay more for every item from electronics to clothing, alcohol to automobiles? Who actually wakes up in the morning and thinks, “Fuck yeah, I’d love for my iPhone to cost 40% more so Trump can pretend he’s being tough on China”? These are the same people who think that when the stock market crashes, it’s just Wall Street “getting what they deserve,” completely ignoring the fact that their own 401(k)s and savings accounts are bleeding out like a character in a Tarantino film. The willful ignorance is so dense it could qualify as a new element on the periodic table; let’s call it Trumpium: unstable, highly reactive, and dangerous when exposed to media attention.

Meanwhile, over on Conservative Propaganda TV, the hosts are lining up like dutiful little marionettes to repeat every Trump talking point with the enthusiasm of kids at a candy store. Sean Hannity, Jesse Watters, and the entire Faux News roster could be replaced with AI models programmed to say “Democrats bad, Trump good, economy great!” on loop, and no one would notice a difference. They’re regurgitating lines straight from the Trump War Room, now led by Karoline Leavitt, who seems less like a press secretary and more like a contestant on a game show called Who Wants to Gaslight a Nation?

Add to the mix Howard Lutnick, Trump’s Secretary of Commerce and the Armani-clad architect behind this economic dumpster fire. A Wall Street shark in a government fishbowl, Lutnick fancies himself a genius of global trade, but in reality, he's just another opportunist playing economic Frankenstein with our paychecks. He sold Trump on the delusional fantasy that tariffs equal strength, spoon-fed the lie that punishing consumers is the same as punishing China. But mark my words; as someone who truly knows Trump, when the consequences finally boil over, and the American people demand blood for their shrinking 401(k)s, loss of social security benefits and empty wallets, Lutnick will be the first body tossed under the infamous Trump bus. Because that’s how this game always ends: Trump breaks it, someone else gets blamed, and the show goes on. Howard wanted to be a power player; well congrats, pal. You’re now the poster boy for economic malpractice.

But maybe, just maybe, we’re asking the wrong question. Maybe it’s not about why they support Trump, but how they justify it to themselves. This brings me to The Dark Knight; yes, the Batman movie, and a line that’s never felt more relevant. Alfred, wise as ever, tells Master Wayne: “Some men just want to watch the world burn.”

Trump isn’t a leader. He’s not even a president in the traditional sense. He’s The Joker in a Brioni suit, lighting matchsticks and flicking them at the American experiment while laughing maniacally. His thirty percent? They’re not looking for policy wins or economic logic. They’re looking for vengeance, chaos, and a false sense of superiority wrapped in a red hat. They’d rather burn it all down than admit they made a mistake.

This isn’t about trade, or China, or bringing jobs back. It’s about ego, about rage, about sticking it to the “libs” even if it means shooting yourself in the foot and blaming the gun manufacturer. Trump has convinced a third of this country that America is better off when it’s hurting, because that pain can be weaponized. And now, as Wall Street gets ready for another bloodbath, the rest of us are left wondering: how many more trillion-dollar reminders do we need before reality cuts through the delusion?

Today will be ugly. The market will plunge. Tariffs will squeeze our wallets tighter. And the same folks who cheered this on will tell you it’s your fault for not believing hard enough in the magic of MAGA.

This is Trump’s America: a nation held hostage by the irrational, the angry, and the proudly uninformed. It’s not just economic policy; it’s performance art, and the rest of us are the unwilling audience watching our retirement accounts set on fire.

And the curtain’s only just gone up. But together, we can end this shit show and restore sanity, stability, and a country where leadership isn’t defined by tantrums, Twitter rants, or which sycophant kissed the ring last.

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